Sunday, June 24, 2007

this day in history













Pulled out my art journal today and found 1) that I haven't drawn in it since January!@#$% and 2) this drawing I did a year ago today. I felt like the mannequin on that day...and a bit like that today.

I took an extended retreat from church this month. Although I am able to gather snippets of quiet while everyone is home, there is nothing like being home alone. So, for the month of June, I decided to stay home from service to be quiet with God. Today, my last day, God fit together a few pieces of an emerging puzzle. It's staggering to me to know that a heart's cry prayer with a friend, a video made 4 years ago and a book written over 50 years ago would appear in my life over the course of a week and merge together in one day to form a message from God.

I feel today, like I did a year ago, convicted, humbled, set free and in awe that He knows my name, hears every prayer I pray, He's the one who brought me to this place; the voice that sings to me, the hand that clings to me, I'm His child and He will always know my name. ptL.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

locks and lots of love













Making a resolution to donate her hair to "Locks of Love," M marched bravely forward to undergo an outward transformation of the work God is doing inside. When she found out about the program, she said, "I can do that!" and set a goal to grow her hair til summer then have it cut. It was an exciting moment and another step in her heart's desire to help children. She plans to keep it short for the heat and in the fall, start growing it out for the next donation.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

it is finished










June 1st will go down in the annals of the history of our homeschool as the day we celebrated our first graduate!

What an incredible time both the day of the ceremony and the weeks leading up to it. I purposefully savored every moment, every memory. I didn't want the day to come and go in a blur of preparations and miss, as a family, the opportunity to remember the road that brought us to this place.

The past year has been a difficult one for S and for our family but, as promised, from the refining fire God continues to bring beauty from ashes. Had
Seth graduated a year earlier, we would have celebrated his intelect and abilities; instead, we celebrated who he is (see speeches below). And, we celebrated as a family who arrived at this milestone together stronger in our faith and stronger in our family identity and bond. Joined by loved ones who supported us along the way, the ceremony was representative of the journey and God's faithfulness along the way.











E was our "keynote" speaker:

My Baba has been visiting with us. Over dinner this week, we discovered she was the only one of nine siblings to graduate high school. Born in Mexico to Russian immigrant parents, life was about maintaining the farm.

When she finished sixth grade, her father said, “That’s it; time to stay home.”

Knowing her father was the boss of the family and that Baba had a strong will, we asked, “And what did you say?”

“No,” she said.

“And what did he say?” we eagerly inquired.

“Nothing.”

She went on to tell us how she came home from school, finished her farm chores before studying into the midnight hour. She then rose at 5 a.m. to complete the morning chores before heading to school.

In addition to a firm faith in God, my Baba has given our family a legacy which values education. She taught this by example of teaching wherever God placed her – at home, Sunday School, girls club and in public school. Her oldest daughter has followed in her footsteps by becoming a public school teacher and her youngest daughter, my mom, became a Homeschool teacher.

Before we were born, my parents moved into a new house in Whittier, CA. The local newspaper landed on the porch. Inside was a two page spread on a local family who adopted an unconventional method of education – teaching their children at home. Dissatisfied with the options available to them, they kept their children at home and became one of the pioneering families in the home education movement. After reading the article, my parents knew if they ever had children, they would home school them. Two years later, Seth was born and the rest is history.

By choosing this option, my brother, sister and myself have had the opportunity to be educated at our own pace. Take reading, for example. My brother learned to read at age 4 sitting next to my mom, 15 minutes a day until he could sound out words by himself. My mom tried to teach me to read the same way. I, however, liked to sit with my back against the seat of the sofa and my feet up in the air resting against the back of the sofa. After intermittent starts and stops, she realized I wasn’t ready and let it go. Then, at age 7, she saw me looking at a book.

“Whatcha doin’ E?”

Reading,” I nonchalantly replied.

“Really? What are you reading?”

I told her. She continued to inquire and, realizing I knew more than the pictures of the book could tell, she had me read the book to her. To her astonishment, I really was reading. The question still remains a mystery, “Who taught E how to read?” Today, my siblings and myself all read well above grade level even though we each learned to do so very differently. Being homeschooled has allowed us to bite, chew and swallow our learning at a pace we could easily digest.

As mentioned earlier, I was not one to sit in a chair. Most of my early school work was done upside down, standing by my chair, whirling, twirling, singing, hopping, skipping, running and/or jumping, in the den, in the family room, in my bed, on the living room floor or at the kitchen table. It was easier for me to think if I was moving. S was different. Most of the time he knew more about the subject before Mom got around to teaching him. I enjoyed tagging along his learning adventures and learned a lot from talking to him (of which I still do a lot of) and listening to him (which I try to do when I’m not talking to him). Being homeschooled has allowed us to approach education the way God wired us. It’s made a challenging road for my parents, but one that we have benefited from.

Although there are many other reasons my parents have homeschooled us, the one that made them choose this for our family was their conviction that this was what God had called them to do. The hub of our school is Jesus: He’s the foundation for every subject taught and the author of our lesson plans. He’s the glue that holds us together as a school and family.

Homeschooling is not perfect. Each day holds its own adventures and opportunities of learning to get along in the relationship laboratory we live in 24/7. But God has blessed my parents for following in the footsteps of the legacy handed down through my Baba. The diploma my brother will receive today is the testimony of the faithfulness of God who planted the desire to learn in my Baba, her daughter and her grandchildren.

Mama's Speech:

S, I am so proud of you. You are a bright young man and have approached your schooling with serious perseverance and unrelenting stamina. You’ve accomplished much in your schooling years. And as proud as I am of your brain, I am more moved by your heart. Inside dwells the living God who formed you in my womb. This past year I have seen a person who is brave and strong as he learned to acknowledge and embrace weakness; I have seen a person who is gentle and kind and took the risk of sharing his heart with others; and I have seen a person whose life God values and treasures and has a plan and a purpose for. Your graduation today is proof that what may seem impossible, is possible with God’s strength. In kindergarten, a verse got you through every new experience as you branched out from hiding behind me and became an independent little guy: “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” We’d repeat that over and over before you went into Sunday School or VBS or school group park days. It still holds true today, Love. You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength.

You know your Mama loves you and I’ll be here for you….unless of course my request for a dorm room next to yours goes through and in that case, I’ll be right next door!

Congratulations Graduate!


Next stop....Westmont!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

young thespian






















E performed in his second theatrical endeavor at the end of May. The play was "Secrets of the Garden Club" and his character, Mr. Travis, a newly graduated overzealous detective eager to test his education on his first murder case.

Drama is definately E's thing. It's a ton of work but so worth it. Normally a timid person, he blossoms on stage as he rises to the challenge of forgetting himself and truly becoming the character he is portraying. We are very proud of you, E!!!!

Monday, April 16, 2007

classic seth













I was blessed with a day off today which included a trip to a mega Borders. Having spent the day alone, I naturally had an abundance of words left to use and S was the lucky recipient of a shelf- by-shelf description of the store. At the end of the monolog (during which he did his best to show an inordinate amount of interest, being a library shelver and all), I noticed he had vased the first iris blooms for his desk. I commented on how they look like beautiful fluffy ladies. He replied with a hint of respectful exasperation, "Yeah, except they don't talk."
Do men have listening quotas? If so, I believe I exceeded Seth's today.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

coincidence?






















My sister is the cupcake queen and sent me her favorite recipe. To start, the batter takes two cups of sugar, five eggs and 3/4 pound of butter. The frosting (which she said, "Use NO substitute for the icing! The pair are meant for each other!) uses one pound of cream cheese, 3/4 pound of butter and 1.5 pounds of powdered sugar. The yield? 18-20 cupcakes.

M is earning the baking charm for girls' club and so tonight, while the boys were at youth group, we mixed up a batch. OH MY GOSHNESS! First of all, it was very difficult to NOT lick our fingers while mixing the batter and virtually impossible once we got to the frosting. I decided half way through the process that we definitely had to share some of this goodness with a couple families at church. We frosted then packaged several on a doily bedecked plate and burdened another Mr. Incredible plate (for the youth group leader) with a few more.

After making our deliveries and returning home with the boys, I chose my cupcake from the cooling rack and plopped myself in the easy chair to watch the PBS offerings and wind down for the night. Before turning on the T.V., I took the first bite. Yes. They were DEFINITELY as good as they looked. If you could only eat one cupcake a year, this would be the one. Enjoying every morsel, I couldn't help but wonder how many calories where in this delectable treat and for how long and how far I would have to walk to burn it off.

click. turn on t.v. The feature presentation? "Fat: What No One is Telling You. An examination of the obesity epidemic." Coincidence? I think not.......

Thursday, March 15, 2007

pop










Been thinking alot about my father-in-law. He passed away when S was 9 mos. old. S's recent 18th birthday has stirred memories.

One that especially depicts the essence of who Pop was is from S's birth. I had been wheeled from the operating room into my hospital room. Shortly thereafter, my parents and J's rushed into the room whizzing past me and straight to the new grandbaby. My father-in-law, however, stopped, gave me a kiss, stroked my hair with his hardworking hands and, in his broken English, asked if I was okay. I'll never forget the look in his eyes. Despite our inability to communicate because of the language barrier, I knew I was loved.

As S grew, he would only allow a few people to hold him - J and I, my mom and my father-in-law. He swelled with pride each time he took a crying S from his wife and immediately providing the security needed to calm his grandson.

Both boys are like him. S has inherited his ability to make anything out of nothing. And Ethan has his impish grin and mischieviousness. I am sorry Ethan has not known him - they definately would have been partners in crime - language barrier or not.


I miss you, Pop.

my mama









Last weekend, M and I went down to Fresno for my nephew and niece's baby shower. My cousin took this picture of the three of us. Mom looked so pretty that day. She turned 77 at the beginning of March and did not look like a great grandmother-to-be.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

march's word

vision: Right now, in one area of life, my vision is limited to the hard facts before me. I sense there is more around the perimeter but I can't see any of it and yet have to move forward. Show me, God, where to step.

vision: I recently took a VNG test to get to the bottom of my dizziness. The goal was to set my head a spinnin' and chart my reaction. The entire test was performed wearing big black goggles that filmed my eye movement. For the first part, I was allowed to see out of the goggles; the second (and most dizziest part) was done with a shield over the front in complete darkness. Some observations from this process:

I couldn't believe how much I have learned to compensate for the lack of balance without even realizing it.
and
During the test, my eyes eventually adjusted to the darkness of the shield and I couldn't tell if I was imagining the light I saw or if it was really real.

Oddly enough, I had just read the passage where Jesus says He is the light of the world and where He is, there is no darkness. Show me God, where I am compensating instead of standing firm; and uncover my eyes to see where I have adjusted to the darkness and am missing the reality of Your Light.

Amen and amen.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

you have arrived



In response to my frustration of what, at times, feels like a continuous life lesson loop, J has often heard me lament, "Will I ever get there?" It's when, once again, the realization hits: "Oh yeah, I remember learning about this trust thing (or grace or surrender or peace or.....) before."

On a recent trip, it became clear to J and S, that the perfect souvenir for me would be the above video to play as needed. Consequently, I have put in a request for my own personal GPS system to clip to my waistband programmed to go off every 20 feet or so calmly proclaiming those treasured words "You have arrived."

Thank you, Loves, for the thoughtful gift.

tea-lightful










M hosted her first tea party Friday. She spent hours making invitations, writing lists for games, crafts and menus in preparation for the big day. Being a compulsive list maker, I was very proud of her organization. I was especially blessed, though, to see her gifts and talents emerging. I am a planner but I am not naturally inclined to be hospitable. Just waiting for this little party to begin, my armpits were soaked. M, on the other hand, navigated the preparations with ease and excitement. It could be age and inexperience but I think it is because she is caring, compassionate and giving. Seeing her rosy cheeks and contented face in the rearview mirror after dropping her guest off and a care package to a sick friend filled my mama's heart with joy. She is discovering who she is.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

happy valentines day










Our chocolate truffles, red jello and heart shortbread cookies are waiting for tonight's celebration. Can't think of what to make for dinner so maybe we'll just skip it and double up on the truffles!
Have a great day!


S and I put together this garland inspired the one found in Country Home 2/07 issue. Too cute!

Friday, February 02, 2007

new word and correction

February's word: Holy Spirit.
There are needs that I have been knocking on God's door about for months. Lately, I've been wondering if I'm asking for the wrong thing. The other day, God took me here:

Luke 11:1-13

1 One day Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said to him, "Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples." 2 He said to them, "When you pray, say: "'Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come. 3 Give us each day our daily bread. 4 Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation.'" 5 Then he said to them, "Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, 6 because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.' 7 "Then the one inside answers, 'Don't bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can't get up and give you anything.' 8 I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man's boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs. 9 "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. 11 "Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? 12 Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13 If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

Teach me to pray, Lord, and fill me til I'm overflowing.

FIT update:
January's word will remain as well. I do have a correction regarding the purchase of size bigger pants: Bad idea. Wearing them for the first time on Saturday to the local art museum, my new size-bigger boot cuts with a little stretch were hanging off my hips and the crotch rapidly approaching my knees by visit's end. My sister's admonition to buy stretch jeans a little tighter ran through my mind as I discretely pulled and tugged to raise them up. I'm back to my old size and things have stabilized.

I'm also still working on the closet 'cause I just haven't had the gumption to pull it together. Bad PMS week but the fog is clearing and a plan of action is appearing on the horizon.

And, creative moments provided much needed diversions throughout the month: A new knitting project, pink and brown valentine scrapbook paper, a trip to the art museum, thrift shop finds for my project stash and a new magazine on card making for inspiration.



Friday, January 26, 2007

fit is the word










Fit into my pants: I cheated and ordered bigger pants. There comes a point where one must accept reality and I was there. My need for new jeans outran my weight loss and so I caved and Kohl's free shipping came to the rescue.













Fit into the closet: Order a bigger closet? The thought did cross my mind. It's looking like this is going to be a multiple day project.










Gardening tennis shoes...a pair for every day of the week (almost). Finding and clearing these alone was half the closet floor! :)

Other feats of FITness:
Still walking! :) Set up my nifty computerized pedometer yesterday to track the miles.
Took my drawing pad to an appt and did a doodle. Ahhhh, relief for my left brain and food for my right.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

on the subject of themes...













J celebrated his 45th b-day this past week. S put a post on his blog which, I believe, needs some explanation. We do themed birthdays and this year chose "American Idol" for Papa's extravaganza. As you will see, he was truly a good sport about it. We also collaborated on a project for him that was insprired by a scrapbooking newsletter - "4+5 = 9 Nine Reasons Why We Love You". Taking nine pieces of cardstock, we designed pictures for the front that captured one of nine things we love about J. On the back was a brief explanation of the chosen characteristic. They included: dedication, witty sense of humor, coffee, tickles, and musical ability. It was a fun joint effort which gave us time to reflect on all this awesome man means to us. We love you Papa!!!!


from the beginning, there was a word

My Sistah and I are each choosing a "Word of the Month" to focus on in 2007. To keep my wandering mind moving toward a goal, I usually select a theme for the entire year. I'm looking forward to this new approach, however, for several reasons. One, it will be fun to start fresh every month! I like fresh starts. Two, other than knowing there are alot of decisions to be made over the next few months., I don't know where the Lord is leading me personally this year. I have inclinations but the bottom line keeps coming back to taking one day at a time. A word a month puts flexibility in the picture and will keep me seeking His will, not my agenda. And last, I'm looking forward to exchanging goals and dreams with my sister. She has been a mentor to me and I'm hoping this year I can be a cheerleader for her.

Sooo, the word for January is:
FIT as in.....

~FIT into my pants (Keep up the established exercise routine. In November I started consistently exercising in hopes of at least maintaining my weight through the holidays. Thank you Jesus, it worked. And, as a bonus, there are pinholes of light poking through my constant brain fog. Now just to stay the course.....)

~FIT into my closet (Get my closet and the garage in order! UGH!)

~Don’t have a FIT (Manage my emotions instead of letting them manage me)

~FIT in creative breaks. (Creative therapy – fill my tank to build some emotional margin)
(While at the scrapbook store Thursday, I signed up for a 3 hour class on AntiquingTechniques next Tues. Creative break no. 1.)

~Establish a routine that enables me to FIT in creative breaks. (This is a perpetual goal as I'm always falling off and climbing back on this horse! We all do better with routine and it will ease some of the tension I’m feeling and allow for fun! I’m also going back to flying with the Flylady. )

Reflection: I’ve realized, while thinking about this word thing, that I love to make goals, lists, and plans. I’ve decided to embrace that about myself and make as many lists as my heart desires. ;D I’ve also decided to practice grace and not drive/wet noodle myself until each list is conquered. (I do that really well too : / )

The Word of the Month idea evolved from here.